24 October 2011

the human experience

Today I read the story of Baby Ronan. The story left me feeling a bit vulnerable and disconcerted. As a mother, it also gave me some clarity and opened up my eternal perspective lens a bit wider. It is stories like Ronan's, or this, or this, or like Luke, who was lucky enough to survive, that have been teaching me more about the role of a parent than any parenting book will ever do. Although my heart aches for these sweet families, I am officially changed as a mother.
It is interesting that so many people are consumed by the success' of life. Especially when success has to do with being a good parent and vaulting your children into the skies of fortune. From birth, we begin to measure the development of our children in hopes that each measurement has met some unwritten expectation. An expectation with strings so invisible that some may not even realize how in control of us they may be.
My thoughts were provoked by a discussion I had with Blake about not pushing Nikson into certain developments, but letting him enjoy each step of the ride. We are pretty calm parents. Never stressing about Nikson eating apples before spinach, or if he should be growing teeth at four months. Right now he "should be crawling", but that is the last thing I want him to do. When he is motivated enough, he will probably just skip crawling altogether. But that opens up a whole new can of expectations. Will that cause him to be a bad reader? Or influence his choices of which college to attend? Most likely not.I think the only measurement that will truly invite our children to be successful, however that is defined by them, is through the measurement of the love we give them while we have them.
This article brought on a whole new meaning of love for me. Loving these little humans in the moments we have them. Nothing is certain. At least nothing during our human experience.
What a blessing the internet is that it enables us to connect with real people who open their hearts to the world. It is so vulnerable and scary and yet those who share strengthen others. I suppose that is why I choose to let so many people into my personal life. I write because it feels good, but some read because they need it.

Happy Monday.

Ronan story found via Bleubird


  1. I agree with Blake. I promise I'm not being biased either. Pictures of the little guy make me happy. He's too cute for words.