29 March 2010

Può essere terribilmente felice?

I am lying here in my bed wondering about a lot of things. Blake wasn't feeling well this evening so we opted for a "night in bed" FHE, watching Fantastic Mr. Fox (it has become a household name and the most quoted film of our marriage). Regardless of our love for the film, we both drifted off to slumber. Annoyingly enough, I am now awake, surfing the internets, blogging, and wishing I was the contest winner of a shopping spree. Seriously, why don't I ever get picked of those things? Speaking of getting picked for those things...Last week I made my sister Natalie give me her biggest bill of the month and I scanned it and emailed it in to our radio station 97.1 zht. They had a "Pay Your Bill" contest that I figured we could enter. Not 24 hours later TJ announces her name and paid off a $500 bill. How cool is that?!

Anyway, back to my rambling subject. Blogging for me is a funny thing. Sometimes I feel like writing and have no clue what I will say. I guess the main reason I write tonight is to sift through some feelings. Everyone has them, and most of the time we don't take time to sift. So after much sifting I have come to a very meaningful evaluation, I need to spend more time doing things that matter rather than thinking up things that don't and doing them. Blake and I were talking yesterday about all the resources the Church gives us to figure out life and learn more about the gospel...think about it for a moment will you...We have conferences, magazines, newspapers, articles, .org's, the scriptures, books galore on subjects that lift and inspire and teach us how to do what matters most. The Lord has given ample resources for finding out who we are and what we can become. Does that limit the need to learn the things of this life? No, I will always love researching contemporary country design, but it goes to show that I spend a significant amount of time not utilizing resources that could be helping me become a better person not just have a incredible home one day. How often do we have moments where life is just about too much to handle and instead of going to the Lord we get on Facebook and update our status? i.e. "I think I am going crazy. Life is a mess." When I am getting frustrated with life or on the contrary, finding great joy in it, I choose to instill in my soul, blogs or worse Facebook stalking someone else. I guess it is because it has become so easy to do so. How convenient is it to disappear into the www? The other day I got a phone call, text, and email from the same person, within in minutes and I responded to each one instantly. It has taken over! It really isn't all that bad, this is just me sifting, remember?

So this is my plight, the new experiment of life. School ends in two weeks and after that I will have a lot of free time (gratefully and sadly). I want to fill my life with what matters most. I have taken Facebook off of my phone, I have set times to check FB and my Reader, and times to surf around...The rest of my time goes to my life, my real life. I have a beautiful home, a totally hip husband who is currently dozing soundly (I love him lots, I feel like I don't show it enough, don't worry I will tell him when he is awake), lots of great neighbors, a rad calling in a fabulous ward, lots of fun things to go "out" and do, and a goal to run 2 half marathons. I just need to reset my priorities and focus on progression, plus I need to "up and doing". I will report. Loves.

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