Well would you like to hear what happened? It is amazing to think that Friday morning I was pregnant and here it is Sunday and I am a mama. I am pretty overwhelmed with the new responsibilities that come with being a mom, but I married the best person to help me adjust. Blake has been everything during this experience and it has given me a tremendous amount of strength. So here is the story...
I was not due until January 26th, but lately I have been feeling like the 26th was just too far away, so Monday, the 17th, during family prayer I prayed that I would be able to have Nikson on Friday. Blake laughed and said that I can't pray for things like that, and for the rest of the week that is what I did. I am stubborn that way. The week could not have been crazier with work and my church calling. Lots of things to do and none of them seemed to be making me go into labor. But lo and behold, Friday morning at 4am I was up with contractions. I timed them with my iPhone app and they were about 7 minutes apart. Nothing to freak out about, but I was starting to feel it. I called into work and got the day off. My contractions were inconsistent, but roughly 3-7 minutes apart so we decided to go in and see Dr. England to see what he thought. After checking my cervix, which was now a 2+, from the 1 it was on Monday, we were sent home and told to come back when they contractions were putting me into some serious pain and were 3-5 minutes apart exactly. We grabbed lunch and went home only to find me in the bathtub at 3pm with some serious contractions. Blake was totally on the ball timing me and at 5pm, he told me to get out of the tub so we could get going. He got all of the last minute preparations done, while I tried to do my hair in between the worst pain of my life. Trying to flat iron your hair while you are bent over in agony takes some serious commitment. Before we left Blake gave me an awesome priesthood blessing that really helped calm my nerves. He is pretty good at that. We drove through rush hour traffic and I pleased to say my husband was very obedient to the speed limit and never ran a single light. We got to the hospital at 6pm and we were emitted into Triage, where they monitor contractions for an hour and check to see if my cervix had changed any since the previous visit. Still at a 2+ I was a little disheartened and nervous. We tried to play flight control to be distracted, but my contractions were getting so bad I kept crashing the planes. The nurse came in and told me that if I hadn't had any cervix change we would have to go home. I said a quick prayer and just asked Heavenly Father to give me a little help. I was dilated to a 4 and emitted into a Labor and Delivery room at 7pm. It was the best room in the unit. It was nice and big with a huge open window. We felt like we were in New York. All of my fears about labor were soon to be conquered as my cutest nurse came in ready to treat me. Amber could not have been a better nurse for me. She was a total champ and she even thought Blake was funny. I got my IV's which happened to be the worst pain of the night (I have vanishing veins, so I had lots of needle wiggling, ouch!) we finally found a vein we could call home after some deep searching (and a prayer). Next was the EPIDURAL at 9:45pm! After I mentally got myself to get used to the idea that I was getting one, (and a prayer) Blake let go of my hand and got to watch the horse needle go into my back as the greatest numbing sensation went through my legs and stopped the horrible pain I was feeling. Seriously, it was not as big of a deal as I thought. I was very surprised and I loved it. I would suggest it to anyone, and I seriously felt that I could actually enjoy my labor rather loath the experience. Blake's parents, Brynlee, and his grandparents came and got to be in and out of all the action, in and out because I am quite a private lady. I am grateful they were there though and that we were able to share the experience with them. A dr. came in and broke my water at 11pm, and I was now dilated to a 6. Dr. England, who was monitoring me from his home, suggested I go on Pitocin to speed up my delivery. Amber hooked me up but before it came down the drip line we had to get Nikson's heart monitored correctly. The monitor was jumpy and she was concerned that the cord was wrapped around him (lots of little prayers). So she moved me over to my other side and checked my cervix. I was dilated to a 9! She was shocked, called Dr. England, and told me we would now prep for delivery. Everything happened very quickly. I began feeling a lot of pressure to push and was nervous I might have the baby without Dr. England. Amber suggested we do a couple practice runs, but after two pushes she said we had to wait for him because if I pushed anymore we would have a baby and no doctor. At 1:00am I started practicing, Dr. England came at 1:05am and we started the real deal and Baby Nikson was here by 1:36am. The cord was wrapped twice around hid neck, but Blake said it wasn't too big of a deal for the dr. to unwind it quickly. They put Nikson right on my chest and Blake cut the cord and I just kept thinking, "We just had a baby! And that is him!"
Everything since then has been quite a blur, but a good blur. We have had lots of people come to see baby and lots of time to just be with him. Our first night as a family Blake came and got in my bed and we said our first family prayer together. My emotions were pretty high. I haven't gotten much sleep so that never helps. It is crazy the feelings I have as a mother. The same day Nikson was born, my cousin Doug and his darling wife Sara were saying goodbye to their baby Luke who had passed away for unknown reasons a few days ago. My whole family was there for the funeral. I have been feeling so badly for them. We often wonder why Heavenly Father does things He does. Why do we experience tragedies and triumphs the way we do? I keep thinking there is no way that was me who just gave birth to that baby and then I think about Sara and how much more strength she will need to say goodbye to someone she had the same amount of strength to bring into the world. I don't really understand God's plan perfectly. I guess what I am left with is the fact that I have faith in it, whatever the reasons may be. I have faith that I will be able to breastfeed (with prayer), and know what Nikson needs when he cries. I have faith in my husband and his ability to also nurture and teach. I have faith that when all the hype is over and everyone is back to normal that I will still be able to be Nikson's mom, and a good mom. I also have faith that Doug and Sara will be with their perfect baby again and that they will make it. I don't know everything. In fact, I don't know a whole lot, but I know what I feel and that has been my most real and intimate memory of having a baby. My relationship with my Heavenly Father has been strengthened. I am overwhelmed with love and gratitude. I am grateful that I chose to marry someone who wouldn't run from trials and who would support me through anything. I am grateful for in-laws who have been like real parents to me, when mine could not be here. I am grateful that I can love someone I know nothing about and yet I know everything about. I am grateful that my family is good at texting so that we can talk without waking up my two favorite guys. I am finding out, especially from my sister's, that I am a lucky lady for how smoothly everything went, and for that I am also grateful. I love our new baby, he looks like a little old man.
22 January 2010
6 pounds 14 ounces