call me mom

every once in a while i get these insanely overwhelming bursts of magic building up inside me.
times in which i don't really know how to quite express my thoughts, but want to so badly.
that's why i call it magic.
it is amazing, but very hard to pinpoint how it is done.
people always told me that having a soon to be toddler was their favorite stage.
a few months ago i would have told those people to take their cheery selves and scadattle.
the little was a tyrant and i was losing the favorite mother contest.
seriously, boy was always mad at me.
BUT just like any dark and dreary wasteland, the fog cleared and this eighteen month old started communicating and this mom started "getting it."
so lately, even though we both have our moments of melts and misbehaves, we have been having the time of our lives!
we had to sell handsome's MINI Cooper to pay of our second car so we could be debt free for when handsome starts school so the little and i have been home bound a lot more than usual.
we spend our days dancing all over the house( i have been sneaking in the bieb songs and we love them, don't tell the dad.), we are doing chores (nikson is on trash duty since he knows right where to go), playing in the best backyard ever, and trying to beat the heat by having water chugging contests and splashing in the sink, tub, or pool.
he asks for something with a word that really doesn't make sense and a gesture and i try to figure out what he wants.
if i get it right he always hugs my neck and plants a big wet one on me.
he is getting to the point where we can start seeing little bits and pieces of us in him.
he loves music like his dad and moves to it like his mom.
he is curious and likes to figure out how things work like dad and he loves snacks and eating like mom. (what a lame trait i have genetically transferred to my firstborn. gotta work on that.)
he laughs at just about anything which for some reason when he does it feels as if that laughter sinks deep into my soul.
each giggle embeds itself so deeply in me that it feels as if my bones are happy.
each little kiss finds its way into the safe walls of my heart.
no wonder moms are crazy about their sons!
they know how to get inside your heart faster and more gently than any person on the planet.
what a skill to have been given as a child.
i was having my weekly phone chat with my mom and we were discussing the funny things her children do and have taken on from their parents.
i got my boldness and quick tongue from my pops and my quirky personality from Pam.
even with my weirdness, my mom assured me she enjoys every second we get to spend together even if she is so far away.
she likes being the mom.

i am starting to understand more and more that the kind of mom she was and is, happens to be the exact same mom i am trying to become.
i remember those moments when mom and i would exchange a look of laughter and they sunk in deep just as they are now.